Disclaimer: This post includes some "colorful" language.
This week, I started reading The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F***: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life by Mark Manson. In the first chapter of the book, he offered an opinion about social media:
"Our society today, through the wonders of consumer culture, and hey-look-my-life-is-cooler-than-yours social media, has bred a whole generation of people who believe that having these negative experiences- anxiety, fear, guilt, etc.- is totally not okay. I mean, if you look at your Facebook feed, everybody there a f***ing grand old time. Look, eight people got married this week! And some sixteen-year-old on TV got a Ferrari for her birthday. And another kid just made two billion dollars inventing an app that automatically delivers you more toilet paper when you run out.
Meanwhile, you're stuck at home flossing your cat. And you can't help but think your life sucks even more than you thought."
Social media doesn't make me feel like my life sucks. My life doesn't suck. In fact, it's pretty awesome. Even when I'm feeling down, it doesn't make me feel worse. However, I kind of see his point. After reading the chapter, I scrolled through my Facebook account. Many of the posts were in the category of hey-look-my-life-is-cooler-than-yours. But I also noticed that people felt okay to post about their negative experiences. For example, my sorority sister's three-year-old son just had surgery to remove a brain tumor. He is currently undergoing more treatment and she posts updates about his progress. She also posts about her guilt when she has to leave him to go to work and her fear that the treatment won't work. She receive messages support and encouragement from her family and friends and but people have used Facebook and other social networking tools to start a fundraising campaign and meal deliveries.
So, what do you think? Do we live in a hey-look-my-life-is-cooler-than-yours culture where people feel it's not okay to post negative experiences? Does social media add to the anxiety, fear, guilt, etc. that people already feel?
I believe that the "hey-my-life" culture is very true! You may even say that it could affect ones self-esteem and distort self image (esp in teens or young adults). But I've noticed it more heavily on Facebook and Instagram but not so much with Twitter and to some extend Snapchat.
ReplyDeleteThe pace of Twitter allows for Tweets to get lost in the shuffle, whereas Facebook keeps post showing up on your timeline until all activity had died down.
Snap gives people the ability to post between one second to twenty-four hours. Once a post has been overlooked or deleted, it's like out of sight, out of mind.
Have you seen differences between the apps?
The teens we've been studying DEFINITELY differentiate between the "permanence" of posting to Instagram and the temporariness of Snapchat. It determines where they post for different things.
DeleteHey, interesting points. A lot of posts are in the hey-look-my-life-is-cooler-than-yours. Also there are a lot of negative feeling vented via social media. Some people like to share their experiences. Some people don't like to share. Some people only want to document happy things. Some people only search for comfort when at their lowest. I had similar thoughts before--"Others seem to live a happier life than I do". Then I don't care about that any more--everybody has their own life. No comparison can be made.
ReplyDeleteThere is another interpretation. True happiness and true sadness are beyond expression.
I don't know. How different people feel after reading posts depends on their personalities, experiences, etc.. What do you think?
Very interesting interpretation. I think you make a really good point that comparisons can't (or shouldn't) be made. In the study Vanessa are working on, teens are telling us that they tend to be "more real" on some platforms. For example, they post attractive photos on Instagram, while they feel more free to be goofy on Snapchat.
DeleteI hear people complaining about the keeping up with the Joneses bit of social media all the time, but to be honest I don't feel it. I enjoy seeing other people being happy, whether through big events or just the mundane enjoyment of everyday life. And I'm guilty of posting the happy kid photos and such. There's a point where the posting can cross a line into bragging (I have a FB friend who does this, I find it a bit obnoxious -- you know, the three paragraph ode to the child who has had straight As along with a photo of the report card? Then again, IMHO, grades and such are private whether good or bad), but just posting happy stuff and life's good moments is OK by me. I don't fret that they're happier or doing better or whatever else. But I'm also pretty happy with my own life, so there's that.
ReplyDeleteTotally agree with you! Seeing others' happiness doesn't make me feel bad about my own life. And there is a point where the bragging does get obnoxious. Especially the "humblebrag." So annoying.
ReplyDeleteInteresting... I agree with Morning Evening that how you interpret others' posts probably has more to do with your personality or life than anything else. Yes, some people may go over the top, but no one is forcing you to read their posts. "Just keep scrolling. Just keep scrolling." = )
ReplyDelete